ABUSE IN TEENAGE RELATIONSHIPS
Abuse is best described as a misuse of an entity or object which is in one’s custody. In the case of relationships, individuals gets abused when their preferred other or partner fails to appreciate their importance or they misuse the purpose of their coming together.Abuse in teenage relationships is at an alarming rate. Just as victims of abuse in other kinds of relationships are advised to withdraw from it, victims of abuse in teenage relationships are also advised to withdraw. An abusive relationship is not worth preserving. This is because both the victims and the abusers in abusive relationships run into problems that persist through time.
It is important to note that no gender is exempted from abuse. Both male and female face their abusive challenges at different times.
Different Forms of Abuse
Verbal Abuse: This has to do with the use of demeaning words on your partner. The victim in this case feels insulted or belittled by the partner’s use of words. This could batter their confidence or silence their opinions.
Physical Abuse: This entails the infliction of physical pain or affliction on one’s partner.
Sexual Abuse: In this situation, the partner is compelled into satisfying the other person sexually. This may entail force or coercion. In all, the will of the victim is not considered or duly respected.
Causes of Abuse
Immaturity: The average teenager is clouded with many ideals that are competing for actualization within him. He is confronted with new realities and he lacks the experience and exposure to handle them. So in most cases, the teenagers are not well equipped for the relationships they start. The pressure may result to transfer of aggression.
Family background: Teenagers have passed the formative years when ideals and values as well as vices are imprinted on their tabula rasa. Whatever they have been brought up with determines their personality.
Influence of drug: In many cases, teenagers who take drug lack control over their temper. They could be aggressive and hostile at contrary opinions.
Effects of Abusive Relationship
- Low self-esteem
- Poor academic performance
- Eating disorder
- Emotional Insecurity
How do you know you are being abused?
When your partner makes you feel unworthy of him or her; When your partner insists on his or her way all the time; When you feel exploited or used as a means to achieving the ends of your partners’ dreams; When you are beaten or whipped by your partner for justifiable or non-justifiable reasons; When you are forced or coerced into doing things that are convenient for you; When you feel fear or despair at the thought of opting out of the relationship; When your opinion does not count or amount to anything and many other instances. The primary evidence of abusive relationships is that the victims in the relationship always feel used or exploited.
Way out of Abusive Relationship
Identify and acknowledge that you are being abused: You have to be sure you are being abused and not that you are being petty or over-reactive. You can detect this by asking yourself objective and sincere questions.
Talk about it: Given that individuals are different and have different background. This is why it is necessary you discuss with the perceived abuser. Communication is needed in any good relationship and so you must express your hurt without attacking your partner.
Demand for a halt if there is no change: after you have discussed this with your partner. If there is true love, then there must be change in the attitude of your partner. If not, then opt out of the relationship irrespective of what you have given to seeing the relationship work.